Courtesy of Overheard In New York:
Dude #1: Yo, check it out: this chick in the lecture I was just in -- huge tits, bro.
Dude #2: Yeah?
Dude #1: Yeah. Fucking bombs.
Dude #2: That's it? That's the story? I mean, I like tits, but there's gotta be a point to a story, man.
Dude #1, after long pause: ... Fag.
--Kimmel Center, NYU
Seven-year-old on cell: Emily, I've been trying to call you, like, three times! Are you still mad at me about... [looks around crowded bus and lowers his voice] ... you know...?
--Shuttle bus, Flushing
Guy #1: God, this girl is a terrible text messenger. Look at this -- it doesn't make any sense!
Guy #2: Yeah.
Guy #1: You love texting, though, right?
Guy #2: Yeah, and it's only gonna get worse when I get my BlackBerry. I plan to cut off voice communication altogether.
--The Burger Joint
[Ed. note: Story of my life.]
Gay barista with asymmetrically-fashioned hair: Oh, yeah, I had really fancy ear bud headphones, too... But then I dropped them in a puddle of my own vomit on the subway, so now I have cheap ones. Yeah, that sucked.
--Bushwick Ave, East Williamsburg
Tourist kid: Look! The Empire State Building!
Tourist mom: Where? I don't see it.
tourist kid: The big, pointy one!
Tourist mom: Oooh, let's take a picture!
Passerby: That's the Chrysler Building, you fucking niggers.
--Outside NYC Public Library
Happy Holidays!
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2 comments:
Those are really funny, except for that last one. But I can kind of relate to the guy who wants to cut off all voice communication. I love text messaging. Hate talking on the phone. In fact, it seems weird to have actual conversations with anybody but my parents these days.
I am EXACTLY the same way. I hate, hate, hate talking on the phone and rarely answer when someone calls, unless I need to speak to them. My friends know to text me if they want a response.
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